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Guest Post: 10 Things Nobody Tells First Time Mums (But Should!)

26 January 2018

It’s been 6 years since Jenny was a first-time mum, but she still remembers it very clearly. "Everything I thought I knew then certainly doesn’t tally with everything I know now, especially those first few hazy months!"

We spoke to family lifestyle blogger Jenny, whose adventures as a mummy of two are well documented on her blog Monkey and Mouse. She told us what she wished she knew before she became a mum.

Predicted size from scans are almost always wrong

If your midwife team are worried about the growth of your baby, then you may get extra scans later in pregnancy. The problem is that these scans are often unreliable and baby can easily be an average size.

Midwives may not believe you’re in labour

When I went into labour with my first son I was told not to go into hospital and just have a bath at home. We chose to ignore that information and go into hospital anyhow and low and behold an hour later baby arrived. I thought it was maybe just me, but it seems it happens a lot! 

How you give birth is up to you

It seems to be a commonly held thought that you HAVE to give birth in hospital and must do as the midwives or doctor says. However, you can give birth wherever you choose and can write your own birth plan dictating where you are giving birth, who is present and everything else. It’s your body and you can choose how to birth, don’t let anyone control your decision (but consider any medical advice if you have complications during pregnancy).

You don’t always love your baby at first sight

There is a myth that you will fall in love with your baby at first sight and then feel incredibly guilty when you don’t. 

Don’t beat yourself up about it, love will grow over time and be just as strong, I promise!

You will be surprised that you can leave hospital

It sounds strange, but you will seriously question the hospital staff’s decision on letting you walk out the door with this tiny precious human. Yes, the baby is yours, but you have no idea what you are doing!

The car drive home from hospital will be terrifying

There is a good chance you will stop the car several times to check that your tiny person is still breathing and the straps are on correctly, so you'll decide to just to sit in the back right beside them. 

The good news is it gets better; eventually you can sit in the front again!

After birth pains

I’m not sure if I just missed the part in the baby books about after birth pains. But they were awful! It’s simply your uterus contracting back to its usual size, but they can still be rather painful and can last several days. Don’t forget the paracetamol!

You will be scared to go to the toilet

Even if you don’t tear, you will be nervous about going to the toilet. I’m not going to lie, it will be painful, you just pushed a baby out! Then there is the after bleeding and blood clots, all normal and gross at the same time!

It’s the best time to travel

When you only have a young baby it really is the easiest time to travel. They're light to carry, so just pop them in a wrap or carrier and you're ready to go. You don’t need an extra seat on the plane, they will sleep loads during travel and if you are breastfeeding then baby has food on tap.

Part of the mum crowd

You will retell the birth to almost every mum you meet for years afterward, sitting on the floor at a baby group having a sort of pow wow. You are part of the ‘mum crowd’ now and you get serious respect for it!

Ps. You will wonder how you can love another human as much

Even if it took a little while for the bonding to happen, you will wonder how you can love another child as much as this one.  Even when you are pregnant and about to have a second you don’t understand how you can share the love.  But it happens, it really does!


Jenny is a family lifestyle and travel blogger with an honest outlook on motherhood. She lives in Scotland with husband Chris and their two boys. You can follow their family adventures on her blog.

What advice would you give to new mums? What would you tell a new dad-to-be? Share your baby experiences with the B&M Community on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

*Views expressed and advice given in this post are those of the author and are not necessarily shared by B&M Retail Ltd.